The flow of progression in a relationship can sometimes seem quite formulaic. First you meet them, then you ask them out, then you become boyfriend and girlfriend, then engaged, then married, then select a home, then have kids. Of course, while some of this progression is normal (it is quite important to meet someone before marrying them,) it’s not always the timeline that people follow. On top of that, not all loving couples decide to make the entire ‘proper’ number of steps in this list nor should they.
In fact, whatever works for you and your partner is a-okay. Perhaps you’ll never get married or have kids. Perhaps you’ll have kids but never marry, or perhaps you’ll never decide to invest in a family home. But if you do, how on earth do you know when it’s time? This can sometimes be just as wonderful and worrying as the act of getting married. After all, marriage is a beautiful thing, but having zero nerves shows that you’re not as invested in it as you should be.
When do you decide you’re ready for that family home? We think we have some worthwhile advice to this end:
When You’re Stable
When a relationship is stable, that is a good sign that taking the next step is possible. Not only should you not have had any major arguments or faux break-ups for a couple of years, but you should have already been achieving solid success in merging your financial accounts and planning for the future. If your partner is absolutely your friend as well as your romantic interest and if you absolutely trust them with your life, this can be an important metric of then moving forward. WIthout that, you are building the foundations of your new house on sand.
You Have Financial Security
Financial security is essential to running a home. This is true no matter if you hope to purchase a home to convert into a business premises through a conveyancing company, you hope to purchase an additional holiday property, or that you simply wish for a humble house to raise your children in. One or both of you should have a stable job with potential future prospects. For example, a freelancer working as the sole source of income in a family should not be considered to have a stable financial situation unless they have plenty of money in the bank or so much work their schedule is full for the fat future.
We can look at all the metrics that we want, but ultimately, it’s a gut feeling we have to know that we’re ready or not. If you are even just a slight bit doubtful after looking for properties and discussing this with your partner, it can’t hurt to wait another matter of months. Never feel pressured into this. It’s a decision you should make with courage, yes, but also a real sense that this is the right choice for the time.
With this advice, we hope things are a little clearer when selecting your first family home.